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Monday, August 14, 2006

Blockbusters On A Title!

Well, its finally here - SNAKES ON A PLANE, the film even star Samuel L. Jackson refused to do unless producers kept its campy title.

Never before has a flick created such excitement just on a movie title alone, spawning not only a highly anticipated sure-fire summer hit, but countless amounts of internet buzz and plenty of coming spin-off products (mugs, calenders, even a 'Snakes on a Sudoku' puzzle book). And all this from a silly title.

It makes ya wonder, if SNAKES is a big hit, will this start a trend in Hollywood? Well, always trying to stay ahead of the curb, I am going to be ready if it does.

Heres a short list of movie screenplays I am working on at the moment. It is with one of these that I hope to pitch a big-time movie producer and launch my new career as a cocky, pretentious Hollywood player.

- SHOWDOWN AT THE SWISS CHALET (one man's confrontation with a quarter-chicken dinner).

- since superhero movies are big, how about... THE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN SUPER-FANTASTIC-SPIDER-X-MAN? (how can it go wrong??)

- SPROUT (a docu-drama about the life of a single brussel sprout...I am thinking Michael Caine as the Brussel Sprout - he IS good, that Mr. Caine!).

- remember that Bill Cosby film from the eighties Leonard Part 6? Well, listen to this genius idea... LEONARD PART 7!

- 120 MINUTES (an intense, real-time thriller about 2 hours in the life of a well-timed alarm clock).

- THESAURUS: THE MOVIE (trust me on this one!).

Hey, laugh if ya want, but if SNAKES ON A PLANE got the green light based on its title, I don't think my ideas are far-fetched. Speaking of, I also have an idea for a Canadian-made thriller set in an airplane flying from Halifax to Toronto in which a bunch of crustaceans packed in the overhead break loose and create chaos pinching ankles of terrorized passengers at 30,000 feet.

I am thinking about calling it LOBSTERS ON A PLANE. Sounds like a lucky title to me.