Cyber Stalker Rant in E Minor*

* yes, this title was ripped off/paying homage to Bill Hicks album Rant In E Minor. So shut up.

A couple of weeks ago Yahoo yanked the plug on a bunch of chat rooms after a news report revealed some of the rooms were being used to pick up minors.

Wow, what gave it away? Maybe the fact that chat rooms contain more creepy characters than a JRR Tolkien novel?

I've never really got the chat-room scene. Part of it was that no one ever had anything to say - "what's your ASL?" "LOL?" "BRB?" "What is this horse SHT?" Will somebody please speak fucking english to me.

Other than cyber sex, I have always assumed there were only 3 other reasons people got hooked on to chat rooms:

1) they're passing time until the Sci-Fi Channel airs another Stargate-SG 1 marathon.

2) they're lonely, socially-inept 13 year olds whose only grasp of idealistic romantic fantasy has been modelled by You've Got Mail.

3) they are there to annoy the hell out of the other two groups.

By the way, if you are a 45 year old married man sitting for 6 hours in a dark basement with all the lights out flirting with pre-pubescent Chat-Room Sally yammering about how she's gonna run away from her Burger King drive-thru dream job and hitchhike to Vegas to meet you - well, you're a desperate, disturbed individual with bigger delusions than the 13 year old and you should turn off your computer and start masturbating to the same thing other men your age do...

Watching golf on TV.